ANTIFA HQ — HOLIDAY DISPATCH

Citizens,

Antifa HQ has completed its year-end review, and the results are in:

Prop 50 passed, democracy still exists, and the good guys actually won a few important victories.

(We’re as shocked as you are. Champagne rations have been approved.)

Your work this year — the calls, the canvassing, the “yes, I have explained this to my uncle six times already” conversations — mattered. Every nudge, every conversation, every door knock bent the needle just a little further away from fascism and a little closer to sanity.

HQ would like to commend you for the outstanding use of hope under hostile conditions — not just in the good fight, but every day. Your skill at maintaining morale despite relentless absurdity is humanity at its best. And advanced bullshit deflection? Folks, we need to bottle that shit and feed it to every misguided American soul! But mostly, thank you for showing up when showing up was the hardest thing to do… truly admirable.

Take the holidays to recharge your power cells, rehydrate your compassion reserves, and remember that the blue wave isn’t coming — it’s already here, and you’re part of it.

January brings new missions, fresh opportunities, and at least three more Supreme Court rulings that will make us double-check if The Onion has taken over the Associated Press.

But you?

You’ve got heart, grit, and the kind of stubborn optimism they can’t legislate away. We’re grateful to be in the fight with you.

Rest up, Citizens.

2026 is warming up its vocal cords and asking if anyone has an extra megaphone.

– Antifa HQ

(Still no merch store. Still thinking about it.)